40. Shit I want to say at work

I may be a secretary,
I am not your personal secretary.

39. Shit I want to say at work

I know I bring my lunch everyday because I'm too poor to go out like the rest of the office, but an invitation once in a while wouldn't kill you either, you walk pass my office to leave.

38. Shit I want to say at work

What you look like in real life is a major disappointment compared to the image I has in my head after a 3-year working email relationship.

37. Shit I want to say at work

Good,
Bad,
or Otherwise...

I should not be able to smell you coming.

36. Shit I want to say at work

I'm young, but I'm still an adult. You don't have to stop telling your story because I walked in the room; actually I think it makes things more uncomfortable.

PS I can hear you from from my office anyway.

35. Shit I DID say at work

Send your own Ecard!

34. Shit I want to say at work

I haven't:
taken off my coat, scarf, hat or mittens,
unlocked my office, turned on my computer, put my lunch in the fridge
-actually the front door hasn't closed behind me yet-
I carry my purse, shoes (so I can change out of my snowboots),
my lunch, and the office mail.

But yes, let me get you some post-it notes.

33. Shit I want to say at work

Please don't diagnose my lunch.

32. Shit I want to say at work

Don't hold a grudge that I scared you awake while you were sleeping at your desk, especially when I'm helping you with something. Besides if you had done it yourself I wouldn't have had to walk past your desk with my loud shoes.

31. Shit I want to say at work

I'm young.
I'm not better than you,
I know how to Google better than you.

30. Shit I DID say at work

"No."
[There is nothing more satisfying than telling a coworker No, and not giving a reason.]

29. Shit I want to say at work

Please note:
Eyebrows are decorative, not a jungle

28. Shit I want to say at work

I didn't make the system, I just follow it.
If you stopped whining about it and just did you job it  would be done by now.

27. I CtrlAltDelete you.

Just copy and paste. Ctrl C Ctrl V

No, highlight what you want to copy then paste.

No, Highlight.with your mouse

Left click and drag.

No, hold the mouse down and drag it until it highlights what you want to copy.

Because you have to move the cursor where you want to palce it 

Your cursor.

The arrow

No, Click the arrow on to where you want to paste it. 

***

Yes, you could have just typed it twice.

26. Shit I want to say at work

To Coworker: 

Thank-you for recognizing I was getting overwhelmed and helping me out.

I won't say it to your face because usually you're a complete DB.

25. Shit I want to say at work

Why did you call me? I'm not tech support.
They're in the directory under: TECH SUPPORT

24. Shit I want to say at work

To my Coworker: 

I know you couldn't have children and that sucks, 

but it doesn't mean you can try and run my life. 

I have a mother, grandmother, and aunt who do that already.

23. Shit I want to say at work

I speak English DB, I just couldn't hear you.
Take me off speaker phone and don't be an ass.

22. Shit I want to say at work

I'M BUSY!

21. Shit I DID say at work

Well, I'm kinda busy but...

20. Shit I want to say at work

Check out Two Guys and Guy.
I love this comic.